"I'm scared I'm going to fail".
A brief pause, a very slight sigh. My husband is used to this. He is strong, trusting and practical. Me? I'm prone to nervousness, flightiness and a sense that things won't turn out.
It's one of those late at night conversations, the children are in bed and we have some precious moments to ourselves before we have to sleep.
"Are you scared that you are running out of ideas for classes?" he asks. Oh no, that is not the trouble at all.
It's failure that I'm afraid of. So often there is a voice in the back of my head saying "what is the point of all this work, you know you're going to fail anyway". Sometimes this fear has been strong enough that I don't try something new or pursue a different idea, fear can be crippling. Many times I have made the decision to give up on trying to make a business, only to change my mind the next day.
I have put so much work into new classes. I have taken the risk of launching on a new platform, it's a wonderful step to have taken, but it's expensive and risky.
My sensible and pragmatic husband listens quietly to my concerns as he has done time and again. He points out that you never know unless you try. He reminds me that it's all in God's hands and if the business does not succeed, it is because He wills it not to - for His own reasons and because He loves and knows me best.
My husband reminds me what I already know, but find very difficult to live. It is not all about me. Everything is a gift, including my life, and that I must be willing to give back to He who gives so generously.
A brief pause, a very slight sigh. My husband is used to this. He is strong, trusting and practical. Me? I'm prone to nervousness, flightiness and a sense that things won't turn out.
It's one of those late at night conversations, the children are in bed and we have some precious moments to ourselves before we have to sleep.
"Are you scared that you are running out of ideas for classes?" he asks. Oh no, that is not the trouble at all.
It's failure that I'm afraid of. So often there is a voice in the back of my head saying "what is the point of all this work, you know you're going to fail anyway". Sometimes this fear has been strong enough that I don't try something new or pursue a different idea, fear can be crippling. Many times I have made the decision to give up on trying to make a business, only to change my mind the next day.
I have put so much work into new classes. I have taken the risk of launching on a new platform, it's a wonderful step to have taken, but it's expensive and risky.
My sensible and pragmatic husband listens quietly to my concerns as he has done time and again. He points out that you never know unless you try. He reminds me that it's all in God's hands and if the business does not succeed, it is because He wills it not to - for His own reasons and because He loves and knows me best.
My husband reminds me what I already know, but find very difficult to live. It is not all about me. Everything is a gift, including my life, and that I must be willing to give back to He who gives so generously.
2 comments:
I too feel like this. A bit of an imposter syndrome for me, maybe they'll see I'm not really that good. Having the strength to trust can at times be it's own challenge
Yes! I totally get the "imposter syndrome"!
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